Sometimes we misjudged of something or someone. Or worse, we misjudged of what we feel. Do you feel that you outrunning something to the wrong place but you pretending that are all okay? Let ‘em out of those current places, throw it up, scatter it off, and make it random! What you are supposed to do is making another infringement. Does the sick modernity successfully turn you into puppet? Who control your world? Ignorance?
Do random things toward random circumstances. The misjudgment is just like your panic attack. In the next moment you’ll sober and start to think what’s wrong and right. People do silly things, that’s why we have two hemispheres of brain, right and left, yeah, and two sides of behaviors, angelic and satanic! Am I right?
What I am going to say is about switching. You did something harmful and you enjoyed it. You did something good but you regretted it. Such circumstances you’ve been gotten in had turned you into something false. And all you do will always fake!
Do you have any girlfriend or boyfriend anyway? Yes? Do you kiss? Yes? Do you make sex? Yes? Come on and admit it, you enjoy those lustful moments and on the other moments you regret it.
You actually and definitely don’t need sex before marriage. I’m not talking about sin, because I have so many uncounted sins (if I believe in sin, of course). I’m not talking about laws, because I often do law’s violation. And hell, I’m not a straight edge person who can talk wise but act worse than non-sXes. I’m just talking about that fake circumstance. You don’t need to be rode by someone or ride someone. You don’t need ejaculation to make love. For Universe’s sake, make love ain’t sexy anymore. Making love is not having sex for me.
Maybe yeah you can give me reason that you have sex with your boyfriend or girlfriend because of love. But practically, your evil side plays the ride. Admit it. Maybe you do swingers a lot, you sleep with your girlfriend’s friend, you sleep with your brother’s friends, or you do sex randomly with people you don’t really know him or her. That’s what sex is giving up to you: a pleasure, out of mind practical satanic rites.
If you don’t like it, then you shouldn’t do it. You can be trapped on it, but you can deny it. That’s how the brain works. To think. To sort what’s good and bad for yourself.
I guess the sense of love has getting refracted. If you love someone then you are ready to be kissed by that someone; if you love someone then you are ready to have sex with that someone. Was love that risky? Was love that hard to carry? Hell no!
And now, what’s really matter is how to think that you’re not such person. You are human, you are fresh and young, then you are still able to think clearly. There’s not lust you’d like to seek, there’s not moan that you’d like to hear, that’s not sperm you’d like to burst. In the precise time, you’ll get all of that, sure. All you want to have are simple joyful feeling of yourself, getting loose in something you love, surrender in absolute freedom. Was that really matter for you? If it wasn’t, make it is!
I don’t give this shit to those pathetic faker psychos because they won’t understand what I’m saying. But someday they’ll think about those million times.
You are so young and you are so fresh. Sober. Wake up. Get up. Come on. Alive! Start drawing. Start playing guitar. Start singing. Start writing fictions. Start riding bikes. Start doing something beneficial. Start action! Universe blesses you all!