Monday, February 13

SECRETS

been cried for a long time, then two days ago I've cried again. That was not a surprising thing, but all the surprise went to the moment I realised that I am all alone. I was on vehicle and there was raining outside. I suddenly cried and I just didn't know why.

We all have secrets. Untold stories, unexpressed feelings, unbeatable egos. But that doesn't really matter to me, because I don't trust anybody.

Sometimes tireless human is the most exhausted one.

Then I think about this one: maybe this is my limit to feel that I am all okay.

But I don't protest.

I'm just feeling stagnant.


Another Acidic Me

I just need to be 
slapped 
real hard on my face
or 
killed 
without 
any opportunity to reborn.

as I drown inside
the anomalies,
I just missed
to be someone
who has
heart
and feel in
love
normally.



- stellar -
The Best Pessimist

Monday, February 6

Narsis

Ada yang diam, ada yang berteriak.
Tak pelak kedua kepala berisi sama:
keluhan.

Demonstran menciumi bibirnya sendiri lalu menjahitnya
berharap semua orang meneriaki namanya,
mendoakannya.

Cukup dengan doa.


Ada yang diam, ada yang berteriak.
Tak pelak keduanya mengeroyoki satu kata:
gengsi.

Para biksu menangisi cinta
satu malam sebelum kepalanya botak
berharap esok airmatanya kering dan bisa terbasuh doa.

Cukup dengan doa.



tuhan, dengarkah?

tidak.

tuhan tidak berkawan dengan para narsis.