SECRETS

been cried for a long time, then two days ago I've cried again. That was not a surprising thing, but all the surprise went to the moment I realised that I am all alone. I was on vehicle and there was raining outside. I suddenly cried and I just didn't know why.

We all have secrets. Untold stories, unexpressed feelings, unbeatable egos. But that doesn't really matter to me, because I don't trust anybody.

Sometimes tireless human is the most exhausted one.

Then I think about this one: maybe this is my limit to feel that I am all okay.

But I don't protest.

I'm just feeling stagnant.

Another Acidic Me

I just need to be 

slapped 

real hard on my face

or 

killed 

without 

any opportunity to reborn.

as I drown inside

the anomalies,

I just missed

to be someone

who has

heart

and feel in

love

normally.

- stellar -

The Best Pessimist

Narsis

Ada yang diam, ada yang berteriak.

Tak pelak kedua kepala berisi sama:

keluhan.

Demonstran menciumi bibirnya sendiri lalu menjahitnya

berharap semua orang meneriaki namanya,

mendoakannya.

Cukup dengan doa.

Ada yang diam, ada yang berteriak.

Tak pelak keduanya mengeroyoki satu kata:

gengsi.

Para biksu menangisi cinta

satu malam sebelum kepalanya botak

berharap esok airmatanya kering dan bisa terbasuh doa.

Cukup dengan doa.

tuhan, dengarkah?

tidak.

tuhan tidak berkawan dengan para narsis.